新高考英语题型优化之读后续写素材与练专题

【创新+拓展设计】新高考英语题型优化之读后续写素材与练专题（1） 续写微技能与思维点拨 ——适用于 2021~2023 届高考 续写主要存在四个方面问题： 1）对原文的理解不到位，续写文不对题； 2）与段落开头语的衔接不合理，行文逻辑不清； 3）情节安排不合理或无话可说； 4）语言表达上，词汇低级且出现较多的语法错误，表达不准确。此外，目前的续写教学以讲评 课、分析课居多，真正系统有效的语言输入很少。与概要写作一样，读后续写作为高考英语大作文， 时间紧，任务重，考前一定要有足够的准备与积累。 微技能一　动作描写 一、动作描写的原则 1.要精准 使用精准化动作类词汇对动作进行细致描写,用一系列小动作而不用大动作或者用含义比 较明确的动词而不用抽象或虚化的动词来描述,可以使描写更加具体生动。试比较下面两句: ①The little boy said sorry to his mother. ②The little boy hung his head and mumbled an apology to his mother. 分析:①句中“said sorry to”不带任何感情色彩,而②句中使用了具体化的表示“说”的动词 mumbled,从而使一个不愿意道歉又不得不道歉的小男孩的形象栩栩如生地复现在读者脑海中。 2.有过程 记叙文中有不少动作描写是一连串动作过程的展示。尤其在展示人物个性的动作时,如果我 们蜻蜓点水、一笔带过,就很难突出人物形象,也很难给人以深刻的印象,而通过细节描写展现出 动作的过程,表现力便会大增。如: ①She went to catch the butterfly. ②She crept along the path, bent over swiftly and cupped her hands around the butterfly gently. Secret and methods分析:①句在描写主人公捕捉蝴蝶的动作时,没有细节的动作描写,因此显得很平淡。而②句 运用了 creep, bend, cup 三个连贯的动词生动具体地描述了主人公小心翼翼捕捉蝴蝶的微妙过 程,具有极强的画面感。因此,在续写过程中,在必要的地方恰当使用一连串的动词来表示过程,能 为文章增添不少色彩。 3.用修辞 除了在动词上做调整,还可以利用恰当的修辞手法来帮助描写动作。比喻、拟人、夸张等修 辞手法都能让动作描写变得更有表现力。 (1)比喻 ①The old man’s face wrinkled. ②The old man’s face was like a withered apple. (2)拟人 ①My stomach was aching for not eating on time. ②My stomach was punishing me for not eating on time. (3)夸张 ①When she heard the bad news, she cried. ②When she heard the bad news, a river of tears poured out. 分析:上面每组中的②句分别使用了比喻、拟人、夸张的修辞手法,使得动作的描述更加生 动形象,更加吸引眼球。 二、动作描写的素材 1.与“看、听、说”相关的词块 ①listen impatiently 不耐烦地听 ②glare angrily at sb.对某人怒目而视 ③glance around/round the room 扫视房间 ④stare at 凝视 ⑤take a look at 看 ⑥overhear a funny conversation 无意间听到一段好笑的谈话 ⑦remark 评论说 ⑧add 补充说 2.与“跑、跳、行走”等相关的词块 ①walk across a street 步行穿过马路 ②walk arm in arm 臂挽着臂走 ③pace back and forth 来回踱步 ④jump to one’s feet 一跃而起 ⑤walk gracefully 步态优美地走 ⑥rush out of the room 冲出房间 【迁移应用一】 The Great Gifts Once, a group of schoolchildren were on an outing. Almost all of them were playing ball, except Monty, who was seen as a bit of a fool—only good for poking fun at. He didn’t like fights, or sports. He wouldn’t even defend himself when they started hitting him! He was so strange. But he played football with the others and kicked the ball that day. It ended up over in a little cave. When they went in to get the ball, they found a wooden chest containing an amazing book. The book was giving off a magical shine. The children ran to give the book to the teacher, who was fascinated by it. They all agreed to read it in class in the coming days. The book was called The Great Gifts, and it recounted wonderful tales about great inventors, artists, wise writers, explorers, and treasure hunters. With each story the children became more wide-eyed, and they were enchanted by all those characters with special gifts. They finally reached the last page of the book, which spoke about the origin of those great figures.The teacher read:“There’s a place in heaven called the fountain of hearts, where, prior to birth, each heart is assigned its special gifts.They use a little bit of everything to make normal people.But, now and again, something goes wrong, and some hearts end up much emptier than normal.In those cases, the hearts fill up with a last gift which makes the person exceptional.They can lack many other qualities; in many ways they will be different from everyone else, and they may well be seen as strange children.However, when their special gift is discovered, their achievements will become part of books like this one.” Paragraph 1: When the teacher closed the book, there was a long silence in the classroom. Paragraph 2: Wasn’t he exactly one of the special cases, as the book had described? When the teacher closed the book,there was a long silence in the classroom.While the children were all thinking about their own gifts,Monty came out with one of his strange comments,“If you get a heart transplant,and they give you a pig’s heart,will you take on a pig’s qualities?” Hearing what Monty said,everyone wanted to burst out laughing,but looking at Monty,they began to fall into thinking. Wasn’t he exactly one of the special cases, as the book had described? Maybe it was right that Monty was the definite case of this kind.All of the classmates felt very sorry for every time they had always laughed at him.From that day on,they all worked together to try to help Monty to discover his special gift in art.Several years later,Monty became a famous artist just as the book The Great Gifts showed. 微技能二　心理描写 心理描写的原则 1.落实“细微处”描写 在描写人物心理活动时,一定 要突出细节,所有的感情都体现在“细微处”,所以尽量不用笼统的词,如 smile,cry 等,而用相关的细节性词汇或词组,例如: ①Lily smiled happily. ②Lily wore a shining smile on her face. 分析:①句中“smile”是一个笼统的描述微笑的词汇,而②句中使用了 wore a shining smile,用词组的形式 更加突出细节,展示了细微和精致的“微笑”。 2.体现“多样性”结构 在进行人物心理描写时,尽量避免平铺直叙,可以多采用如非谓语动词的形式,作为谓语动作的伴随状态, 从而使得描写到位,并体现语法结构的多样性。如: ①Her eyes were filled with tears,and she offered her sincere thanks to the man. ②Tears filling her eyes,she offered her sincere thanks to the man.分析:①句在描写心理活动“哭泣”时,用到了 Her eyes were filled with tears。而②句则把这句改成了独立 主格结构,运用了 Tears filling her eyes,更显得描写的细致,同时也体现了句式的多样化,展示了高超的语言运 用能力。 3.展示“丰富化”修辞 除了选择细致的心理描写词汇和多样化的句式表达外,提升语言层次的另外一种方式是多使用修辞方法, 例如: ①The smile on her face shone like a diamond. ②I feel like I am floating in an ocean of sadness. 分析:①句中,把“微笑”比喻成“像钻石一样闪闪发光”;而②句中,把“悲伤”比喻成“漂浮在悲伤的海洋里”, 展示了用修辞来体现细节描写的丰富。 二、心理描写的素材 1.与“喜悦和满意”相关的词块 a bright/shining smile 灿烂的微笑 a mixture of excitement and happiness 既兴奋又 开心 burst into laughter/burst out laughing 突然大笑 起来 be wild with joy/delight 欣喜若狂 be joyful about/at/over 对……很高兴 be in high spirits 情绪高涨 be pleased beyond description 快乐难以言表 light up 喜逐颜开 be content/satisfied with 对……满意 be delighted at 对……很高兴 with pleasure 非常乐意 2.与“悲伤和烦恼”相关的词块 be sad at heart 心里悲伤 be down in spirits 情绪低落 an ocean of sadness 悲伤的海洋 burst into tears/burst out crying 大哭起来 sob 啜泣 be clouded with grief 阴沉的悲伤 be in low spirits 情绪低落 fall into despair 陷入绝望 feel depressed/discouraged 感到沮丧/泄气 have a worried look 愁眉苦脸 3.与“生气和怨怒”相关的词块 be very angry at 对……很生气 feel angry/annoyed 感到恼怒/生气 be seized by anger 充满愤怒 be fuming with rage 大发雷霆 tremble with anger 愤怒得颤抖 a look of burning anger 愤怒的一眼 glare at sb.怒视 flare up 勃然大怒 be in a rage 一怒之下 be mad at 对……生气 【迁移应用二】 One day,my brother and I were alone in our apartment.The reason was that my parents had both gone for a ball party and had left me in charge of everything.I was doing my homework while my younger brother was watching TV.All of a sudden,the doorbell rang.Ding-dong!Ding-dong!My younger brother had rushed to the door before I decided to answer the door.We both thought that our parents had come home.As a result,he unlocked the door and opened it. Outside of the house stood a man who wore a black raincoat and black rubber boots.He looked no different from other people and he said that he was a salesman and asked politely if our mother or father was at home so he could talk with them.Without any thinking,my brother said,“No.”He asked if we would like to buy some comic books,which he was selling.I quickly explained to him that we were not supposed to buy anything without our parents’ permission.However,it seemed that he was not willing to follow my advice and he had an intention to enter our house. Then,I realized something terrible would happen.As I was about to close the door,he forced his way into our house.He took out a knife and forced me to tie up my brother’s hands with some rope which he took out from his pocket.I tied up his hands but I tied in a special way so my brother could untie himself as we often did.The man then tied my hands up and locked both of us in the kitchen. Soon,he went upstairs to search the bedroom for something valuable.I managed to teach my brother to untie the rope on his hands.He then untied me.I rushed to the telephone to call the police,but the line was dead. Paragraph 1: The doors were all locked from the outside and what’s worse,I did not have the keys. Paragraph 2: Just at the same time our parents came back home. 范文欣赏 The doors were all locked from the outside and what’s worse, I did not have the keys.But luckily, the man forgot to lock the kitchen window.Both my brother and I managed to get out of the house through the window with joy and we ran to the nearby police station, nervously but happily, where we asked them for help.The police bravely arrived at our house as soon as possible.And as a result, the man was caught, which made us very happy. Just at the same time our parents came back home.The police asked my family to go to the police station.It was at there the police told us that the man was a wanted robber pretending to sell comic books and they had been looking for him for a long time.The police praised my brother and me for our braveness.Back home, I told my parents the whole story about the robbery with a mixture of excitement and happiness.They were thankful that we were not hurt but they scolded me for not stopping my brother from opening the door to strangers.I learned a lesson on safety and responsibility. 微技能三　修辞描写 Examples of Metaphor Example 1 All religions, arts, and sciences are branches of the same tree. (Albert Einstein) Clearly, Einstein wasn’t talking about a literal tree. But he’s showing a close relationship between different topics by suggesting that they’re all part of the same living thing. He also basically raises an interesting question – if art, religion, and science are all branches, what should we call the tree’s trunk? 很明显，爱因斯坦说的不是字面意义上的树。但他通过暗示不同的主题都是同一生物的一部分，展示 了它们之间的密切关系。他还提出了一个有趣的问题——如果艺术、宗教和科学都是分支的话，我们该怎 么称呼树的树干呢? Example 2 That football player is really putting the team on his back this evening! Football commentators use this phrase all the time when an entire team appears to be depending on its running back. The image of a single man running hard with a whole football team on his back is an expression of hard work and dedication.当整个球队似乎都依赖于它的跑动时，足球评论员总是使用这个短语。一个人背着整个足球队拼命奔 跑的形象是努力工作和献身精神的表现。 Example 3 She was a rock star at our last business presentation. This is probably not referring to a literal rock star falling from space or the other common metaphor: a musician performing at a rock concert. Instead, it simply means the person delivered a great performance at the meeting and stood out like a rock star on the stage. 这可能不是指字面意义上的摇滚明星从天而降，也不是其他常见的比喻:音乐家在摇滚音乐会上表演。 相反，它只是意味着这个人在会议上表现出色，像舞台上的摇滚明星一样引人注目 微技能四　外部冲突 1)角色之间的冲突 (人物观点差异，竞争需要等) 如 ： (201711 浙 江 高 考 )On the fourth or fifth night, we had trouble finding a hotel with a vacancy. After driving in vain for some time, Mom suddenly got a great idea: Why didn't we find a house with a likely-looking backyard and ask if we could set up tent there? David and I became nervous. 开车找旅馆---徒劳无功---母亲建议 搭帐篷在他人后院---David 和我倍感紧张，心有不悦(母子的观点不一) 2) 角色与环境之间的冲突 如：(201706 浙江高考) Then Mac heard quick and loud breathing behind him. ……he saw instantly that it wasn't a dog at all, but a wolf: quickly catching up with him. Mac's heart jumped. ……, he fired the spray at the wolf. A bright red cloud enveloped the animal, and to Mac's relief, it fell back, shaking its head. But a minute later, ……. Then it ……, tearing open his tent bag. He fired at the wolf a second time, and again, it fell back …… Mac 骑车独自行，路遇饿狼，与之搏斗，险象环生。(人--角色与狼--环境大战) 3) 时间依赖的发展 ：决策变得紧急 如： (201706 浙江高考)The car abruptly stopped in front of him. "Get into the car." Paul shouted at Mac. Mac jumped off the bike and slid into the car without delay as the wolf was just two steps away and was about to tear Mac into pieces. What a narrow escape! 骑车突停面前---急喊上车---Max 上车避险---饿狼近在咫尺(此情此景， 刻不容缓) 4) 增加障碍：人物角色必须克服 挑战, 以达到他们的目标 如：(201806 浙江高考)But before we jumped off the horses, we found that we had been off the beaten track and got lost. We had no idea where we were and it got dark. Exhausted and hungry, I wondered if we could find our way back. 小兔突现---马儿受惊---草原迷路(障碍 1)---天色渐黑(障碍 2)---又累又饿(障碍 3)----心理恐慌 (障碍 4 充分利用环境描写可以起到烘托故事高潮的作用。当故事角色在碰到困难时候，我们往往要加大笔墨 来描写故事环境的黑暗、恐怖和不祥。强化环境描写增强了高潮元素，我们感受到了紧张的倍增。 例 1 ： Immediately, an absolute darkness ruled the forest( 黑 暗 ). Even worse, the temperature suddenly dropped dramatically. (寒冷) 例 2 ： It didn’t take long for the forest to be enveloped in darkness( 黑 暗 ). Her rasping( 急 促 的 ) breath steamed(寒冷) in the moonlight and her throat was parched(干渴的) from thirst.1.后续情节一般为故事的高潮或结局，要尽量符合原文思路，设计并发展情节，想象要合理，情节要连贯，并 求得与读者的心理共鸣，让读者回味无穷。 2.续写时心态要端正，所续写内容要积极、健康向上，把事物美好的一面展示出来。 3.利用自己已有的知识和经验，在继承原作者风格和语言基础之上，准确、地道地表达，充分展示语言的表现 力。提高关联词与过渡语的使用率，增强整句表现力。 4.如果所给短文为议论文，那么议论文中的段落首句多为主题句，观点鲜明。续写时，要围绕段落分论点确定 论证方法，如正反对比、例证等